Another wife

quitter

2007-08-20T20:00:00.000-06:00

i think i am quitting this blog. i want to quit being nice to people i hate. i think i am going to quit my job. i just want to quit everything at once. sounds like fun. i'll let ya know if i decide to start something else up, only to quit it in the near future. or maybe i'll just quit something right before i start it. whatever. quitting time:)

the breakdancing Houdini

2007-08-03T12:35:00.001-06:00

the worm will getcha every time....

2007-08-03T11:50:00.000-06:00

so yesterday i mentioned that jason was at the cub's game and he went with his entire office as a "work outing." he left for the game around 11:30 am. and he returned home last night at about 12 midnight. now, i was expecting some of his usual antics, (like his rhyming or making me laugh at everything that comes out of his mouth) but THIS TAKES THE CAKE...

i text him at 10:35 p.m. with "U OK OUT THERE?" he sends me this, "OH MET TAR BEOME ARE YOU IN 10." i am like, HUH? but i am cracking the fuck up. i am still cracking up right now, because i had to look at the text to get it right (so i just figure he's trying to text with that crazy blackberry and sometimes he hits the wrong buttons, and it's been all jumbled even when sober, although it's never that bad, like when he texts me about nick and calls him "buck" because of bad texting skills. that too is hysterical) ok, so i get ready for bed, i am reading a magazine, and all of a sudden i hear him downstairs shuffling around, taking off his clothes, and shushing himself to be quiet. shhhh. shhhhhh. shhhhhh. then he makes his way upstairs in his underwear, and he is BLEEDING PROFUSELY from his forehead. no shit, like i think oh my God, he has been mugged. looks like maybe someone hit him on the head with a beer bottle. so i calmly say, "jay, are you ok? you are bleeding." he tells me yeah, he heard that he was bleeding, and yeah his head hurts a little. so i tell him to come with me to the bathroom. i get out the first aid supplies and i florence nightingale his forehead back together. it's deep, it's big and it won't stop bleeding. i have to use a shit load of hydrogen peroxide and gauze and all the while he is telling me what happened. NOW THIS IS WHERE IT GETS GOOD.... he says, "i was doing the worm (um, for those of you not cool in the 80's like my husband apparently was, the worm is a break dancing move where you lay on the floor and then somehow, you'll have to ask the master jay, hoist your body in a worm like frenzy across the room.) so he continues with, "i was doing the worm, and at the end when i got up, i hit my head on the bar, like maybe a wrought iron type bar, and then everyone said i was bleeding, so i said i have to go now." so i ask, "did they tell you to leave or did you go on your own, and why didn't someone call the paramedics, this is pretty bad?" he tells me that maybe they were going to try to help him, but he decided that it was time to go and he "houdini'd" his ass right out of there. THEN, instead of getting in a cab, decides to WALK home. from wrigley. 2.2 miles. in flip-flops. with a bleeding head. AND THEN DECIDES to RUN, cuz walking is taking too long. so he takes off his flip-flops cuz they are "not like his nike's" and he runs barefoot. bleeding. drunk. the wrong way. at midnight. he ran NORTH to irving. hi, we live like a mile SOUTH. so i am fixing his head, performing minor surgery, trying to place the skin back in line so he doesn't look like scarface, and basically trying not to laugh, i feel so bad for him, but this is all too much to take. now, i look at his feet. he has pebbles, and cuts and tar all over the bottom. i get him to somehow sit on the vanity, without falling over and wash his feet. they are black. and so gross. and he tells me the story again and again about what happened, just slower and slower each time. he looks like a car crash victim and he goes to bed.

now every morning nick comes in our roon when he wakes up, he always goes to jason's side of the bed and this morning is no different. EXCEPT...nick comes in and says, "daddy, boo boo head hurt, bumped his head, mama call doctor, no more monkeys jumpin' on bed." i am still laughing.

2007-08-02T20:07:00.000-06:00

so like two days ago or so i told jason that i just don't like him. i told him i was unhappy and that i was just not that into him. it wasn't very serious. i was just kinda in a blah like way. the next day he sent me flowers. so now i love him again. i am crazy
he's at the cub's game today, it's so freaking hot nick and i stayed inside most of the day. we went shopping, and ran around, but no park today. we did that everyday this week anyway. i keep packing a picnic lunch, we head out to the "water park" (um, it has a big sprinkler) and then i don't feel rushed to get home in time to eat and nap. there is a fine line there. sometimes if i don't time it right, he's WAY too tired to eat and then he just falls asleep and then he's starving when he gets up in the afternoon.
went out for a very much needed girl night last night. drank 4, uh huh, 4 glasses of wine. whoops! they were super good. i was ok this morning. just a tiny headache. i ate some pills, drank a coke and was good to go...just like the old days....except then it would have been 2 bottles of wine, a massive headache, 1/2 a bottle of tylenol, and a 2 liter of coke...so maybe times have changed more than i think...and my body is very happy for the change.

CAKE CAKE CAKE I WANT CAKE or maybe just at least a cookie?

2007-07-29T20:05:00.000-06:00

why am i awake? better yet, why am i drawn to my computer, to this blog? after getting up at 4 the last two mornings in a row FOR WORK, i am surprised i can complete a sentence. i am STARVING. all i can think about is the neighbor boy's birthday cake. wonder if there is any left? think they'd mind if i just stopped in for a slice? years ago jason and i decided that we were hungry for birthday cake on like a random tuesday night....we went to the jewel and bought one. it said happy birthday on it and everything. it wasn't anywhere near either of our birthdays...we didn't care. that's how i feel now. i want some cake.
i saw all of my girlfriends' today at work. it was so fun. it took the "this job majorly blows" right out of my day. we laughed and hung out and had coffees...anyone who saw us probably thought that is what our typical day is like, just flying around, laughing and having fun......yep, i am living the dream. right.

another birthday, old man

2007-07-25T12:05:00.000-06:00

yesterday was jason's 46th, i mean 37th (ha ha) birthday! i gave him trouble all day, it's pretty funny right now, i mean he's nearing 40...but it won't be in the next few years when i am. so i suppose i should knock it off right about now. honestly, he's never looked better, started running...seeing a shrink, eating vitamins, you know all that good shit you do when you start to realize you are not getting any younger.
anyway, we had a really great day, he took the day off. we took nick for a long bikeride to up and down the lake and then out to lunch. nick sang, "happy birthday to you" all day to anyone that was listening. last night we had anna come over to watch nick and we went to turquoise for dinner and then to see that comedy with adam sandler....chuck and larry get married (or something like that) it was funny, we laughed out loud through the entire movie.
when we got to the movies and we found our seats, i went to get the snacks and when i returned i had 2 bags of overflowing popcorn, some candy and a super size (bigger than my head) cup of orange pop, well there was a huge dude sitting next to my seat, and as i bent down to pull my seat down, i spilled like half of my popcorn on him! it was seriously funny, maybe because i was lit from the ONE jack daniels i had at dinner,(oh, by the way, i am drinking again, not much but work has caused me to have to drink again...and not only alcohol, but caffeine too.) or because i was having a hard time getting my balance cuz i was wearing super high red heels (yeah, you know i like to go to the dark ass movies looking good) whatever it was, i couldn't stop laughing. totally inappropriate, but nevertheless, funny. not sure if the big dude was laughing or not, he was wearing my super salty and buttery treat, but he was busy texting all of his friends anyway...

the stalker

2007-07-19T20:04:00.000-06:00

jason just walked out the door, he's totally stalking our neighbors. our neighbor dude was out on his porch with a friend, and we were saying goodbye to my mom (thank you very much, for all of your help this week...) so jason stopped to say hi. well, the neighbor dude's friend just so happens to be a friend of some of our really good friends'. so, they are all talking (not watching nick) and i am running into the house for my phone, in case work calls, (because everyone knows how much i love it when they call me and i have to go at a moments notice.) and they ask jason to come back later for a beer. so that's all jason can think about all through putting our son down for the night. he's having a beer, pretending to hang out with me, all the while, waiting....patiently....peering out the window....sending them texts.....listening out the window....just waiting until they come back out on the porch, so he can hang out and have a beer. dude, chill out. if you need to hang with your friends so bad, just say so. don't act so desperate.

oh, i am probably on jason's shit because he made me mad earlier. i am wearing a pair of shorts that i should not wear out in public. i really don't think that anyone who is old enough to read, should be allowed to wear clothing that has writing along the butt...you know what i am talking about, think juicy sweats...or in my case today, a pair of victoria secret shorts from their "pink" line. my shorts are like long cut-off sweats, that say PINK across the butt. i totally only usually wear them to bed or around the house, but today i was super tired, so i wore them out. i felt self conscious all day, but my mom said they looked cute. LESSON: don't ever listen to your mom about cute. mom's ALWAYS think their kid looks cute, no matter what. think about the ugliest person you know, now think about their mom. what does their mom think of their kid? ugly? doubtful. cute? uh-huh.
anyway, i am wearing the shorts with PINK on the ass. and while i am cleaning up dinner. yep, i made dinner, didn't get home until 2 a.m. and nick was up at the crack, but yep, i made dinner...so i am cleaning up dinner, and jason says, "is your butt hungry, cuz it looks like it swallowed the letter " I." ha ha ha ha ha, NOT FUNNY ASSHOLE. normally, on a regular "i got some sleep last night" day, i would have laughed at this comment. tonight? i just got mad. now i can't even stand him. he told me that he was going to chalk up my non-sense-of-humor to lack of sleep, and let me slide. let me slide?? huh? i think you just inadvertently told me i had too much to eat for dinner, and that i am a lazy bitch who needs to work out and not wear such tight pajama pants in public that have writing all over the ass. isn't that what you really wanted to say?! THEN JUST SAY IT. he says, it's my fault for the comment anyway because i am the one who taught him about people's butt's looking like they are hungry. (which, by the way...that's jessica's, she taught me that one in the airport to pass the time...)

dewey decimal is a dork

2007-07-16T19:27:00.000-06:00

so my feet ache. think it's cuz i never sit? seriously, i sit when possible...it's just that it's for like a nanosecond at a time. usually nick is getting into something and there is no sitting for me. when we were in california visiting my grandparents, my opa and i took nick to the park and while we were getting ready to leave, opa asked me if i wanted a lawn chair. i was like, "um, op, i don't sit at the park...." he laughed and totally didn't get it, but whatever...then we got to the park and he clearly understood. the rest of the week when we were getting ready for the park, he never even packed a chair for himself, ha!

went to the library today to check out a book on how to help me deal with nicholas and his new "attitude." so i have the name of the book and the author, but i have NO CLUE how to find this thing. i am holding nick, because when we are at the library, he thinks it's a free-for-all and he starts pulling random books off the shelves all the while laughing and saying "book" "book on floor" "mama, book, i drop it" SO, i am in an aisle, pretending to know what i am doing, looking for a book that i can't find, trying to remember how that dewey decimal system works, and wishing i would have paid attention in elementary school on "library day." whatever, and by the way, WHY do we use this dewey decimal system anyway? (random thought, do you remember the bookmobile? like i would ever let my kid into a dark trailer on wheels with some guy out on parole driving around to all the schools? and they'd only let like 4 kids in at a time...hmmmm....) anyway, back to goofy dewey. is he for real? or is that just some made up system name? here's how i think the library should work: ok, you look up online what book you want to check out, shoot them an email or order it with their "check out order form," tell them when you will be there to get the book and then call the librarian from your cell when you pull up, they have some dude named dewey run the book out to you, he has a machine (like a credit card reader) that scans your library card and the book and he prints out a receipt. dewey gives you the book, transaction final. SO EASY. i might just start my own library. AND like blockbuster, my library would have no late fees. since this utopia library doesn't exist, i had to go up to the desk, and ask the chic to help me find the book. i thought she was going to send me to a computer and make me look it up myself AND i think she would have but nick had just farted, so she wanted us out of there. she had to order the book for me, and she said she'd call me when it was in. see??? my library plan is already starting to work....

july

2007-07-13T20:09:00.000-06:00

my neighbor, her kid, stephanie, and abby all came over today to have a drink. i needed it. it's been a long month and it's only the 13th.

yesterday, all i could think about was beating my son. he got mad at me, and bit me on the face. he's lucky i didn't bite him back, 'cuz i thought about it. then he poked me in the eye like 3 times, hard and right IN my eye, not next to it, not even softly, he just poked his motley little finger STRAIGHT into my pupil. i thought i was going to have to kill him. and to top it all off he did not take a nap. ugh.

(ok, jason just walked in the door, he's been out with his friends for a drink after work....and i can always tell when he's been drinking too much because he rhymes all of his sentences. it cracks me the eff up. i've called him on it before...but it's been awhile since he's been out drinking, here's what he just said..."i have to pee, flea." ha ha ha! what a dork. think he gets any digits with slick game like that?!)

anyway, i was talking about my stupid day yesterday....actually i am done talking about it. i think i would rather be entertained by my way cool husband. this is too good to pass up and it's not so often that i can laugh at him...oh, no way...now he just came in here and said, "hey, blogstress, i know you are going to be mad at me, but i am going to go outside and have a cigarette." WHAT A DUMBFUCK. yeah, i am mad. he's stupid and now i don't think he's funny anymore. now i just think he's gross. and dumb. and smelly. and stupid. and i hope he reads this so he can see how dumb he is. did i mention stupid?

ok, so now i am mad at both boys in my house. i really wish i would have married a non-smoking woman. life would be so much easier. but nick would look so much different....

2007-07-12T20:01:00.001-06:00

i hate everyone everywhere. and now i am going to sleep.

train wreck

2007-06-29T20:19:00.000-06:00

how could i forget?! one night this week while watching "top chef" (bravo) (love it) they kept running ads for "hey paula," as in paula abdul. i couldn't stay away. i love it. it is the best train wreck on t.v. check it out.

nice day

2007-06-29T19:49:00.001-06:00

took the day off from being a wife/mother. went out with a girlfriend for brunch and shopping. got my hair cut. looked for a dress to wear to 2 weddings (one is next week!) and didn't find shit out there. used a gift certificate for a really cute t-shirt that i wouldn't have normally spent $85 for, but since i had the gift card, it was just the right purchase. tried to use another 2 gift certificates at another store and was uninspired. in all it was a nice day.

jason has a headache, he actually woke up with it and still has it. he's upstairs laying down.

my neighbors are still fighting the flood. it totally sucks for them, it could have been us. and i had this whole thing i was gonna say about renaming him noah and bringing over a pair of animals, but somehow i've rethought that and it's really not even fun to joke about. it just sucks that they just moved in and now this is happening.

oh by the way, my house still hasn't sold. no one even comes to look at it. is it even on the market?

shitty blog...(yuk, sounds nasty)

2007-06-28T12:09:00.000-06:00

i just laughed my ass off at a girlfriends' blog. wonder if i can post her blog address so others can read it. i also feel pretty bad about laughing because it's all about her shitty life right now. CLARIFY: not shitty all the time, just right now. and i must say, it makes me laugh because i know how shitty life can get and i am just happy that there is someone else to share the shittiness with.

speaking of shit, my neighbors' house flooded a couple of days ago with the huge storm, as many places here in the city did. anyway, they are ripping out everything in the basement as he thinks he may have seen some of jason's shit floating by....(we are all on the same sewage line--condo's suck). and i say jason's shit, because i banish him to the basement bathroom to do his duty, it makes me want to puke thinking of him sitting in there with his laptop (YUCK) taking a dump.

don't worry, i use the desktop computer to blog....in case you were wondering.

birthday bliss?

2007-06-23T12:24:00.000-06:00

dude, i can not just keep up with this blogging stuff....

what have i missed?

Oh, yeah, i had my 32 (WTF?!) birthday. and it fell on father's day (joy) this year. and since i was taking nick to california on that day, we celebrated (HA) the day before. we really didn't do much. we had thai delivered, i had a glass of (crappy) white wine, but i drank it anyway--jason had made a special trip to the liquor store to buy it--it was one her really liked and wanted me to like it too. so i did (not). but whatever.
what did i get for my birthday you ask? let me see....well, first of all i got my teeth whitened by a new laser called ZOOM. it was way cool. it took about 2 hours and it was well worth it. shane (my friend and dentist;) ) did it for me. here's the bad part, his office is so fucking far away, i felt like i was in iowa. jason just kept driving and driving and driving.....cicada's hitting the windshield everywhere, then when we got there i had to wait for my appointment. so then i went to target to kill some time and the cicada's were dive bombing my head. i was freaking out. ok, but back to my teeth....so it takes awhile to get prepped. they have to put spf all over your lips and then they cover your face with wild glasses and gauze and you have a shitload of gauze and other weird dentist paraphernalia in your mouth. but then it's easy, just sit back and relax and whiten! the last 15 minutes was a bit sensitive. and when i left i was in some pain, but less than 48 hours later---no pain, no tenderness, just super white. totally worth it. you should do it now. call shane (click on his name for his website) and good luck getting to b.f.e.
ok, so then after i got my teeth whitened (present from jason) then he gives me a card with a folded up piece of paper in it....an apple iphone!!!! they go on sale on the 29th and he said he's going to wait in line to get me one, cuz' i should have one. HUH? isn't this the dude that wants to kill steve jobs? isn't this the dude that calls his ipod the f.u. pod? i don't care who he wants to kill or hate, i'm getting the iphone!

then, nick, my mom and i went to sunny california to visit my grandparents and my brother. we had such a good time. i seriously wonder why the eff we live here in the midwest? why do we deal with winter? why don't we just move? i am serious. i know you don't believe me. but i am for reals.

i like jail.

2007-06-14T19:59:00.001-06:00

oh man, i am so tired. i took nick to naperville to watch a friends little one while they were without a babysitter...i had to go last night because i couldn't make myself get up (so i thought) so early in the morning and drive all the way out there. well, my plan didn't work. nick and i got out there at about 8:15 pm, i thought for sure he'd fall asleep on the way and then i'd just transfer him to his porta-crib. he had another plan. he decided to act like a wild man, would NOT go to sleep and then once i thought he was just gonna cry it out, here he comes on his way down the stairs to join me and my friend while we are hanging out. HUH?! HE CLIMBED OUT OF THE PACK-N-PLAY! we could not believe it. so he finally went to bed in my arms at 10. ugh. then this morning, bright and early, yep, 5:30 AM he's up and ready to as he would say, "play, play." then for his nap, (yeah right) i put him back in the porta-crib and WATCHED him hoist himself out of that sucker. he looked like a midget mary lou. it was unbelievable. he has some serious moves. so, we are home and wiped. tonight i thought for sure he'd just be so tired he'd go straight to bed, no protest. WRONG. the dude, totally mary lou'd his way out of his crib! i was at the kitchen table and heard a major thud and just knew. so now, finally, he is in his crib (i hope) and sleeping. i had to lower the bar, so if he decides to catapult his way out, he won't have as far to fall. i shut my bedroom door and there is a gate at the top of the stairs, so if he's roaming around, at least he is confined to his area only. he really needs to work on his dismount and then i won't worry about him hurting himself....but what i am really worried about is losing the crib. i am sad to say, i liked locking him up in there. we are going on vacation this week, what am i going to do? i loved just putting him in the crib and walking away. cribs are like a little jail. you can do anything you want, just put the kid in there with a book or a toy or whatever...and know he'll fall asleep sooner or later. but now, i have to worry about him breaking out.

moments of sadness

2007-06-13T12:12:00.000-06:00

do you ever think that you create your own stress? i think i might be. i think that i am causing myself to be completely stressed out. and i have it pretty good, so i shouldn't be. so what up with that? i always feel like i am being pulled in 30 directions. i feel like i start things and i never finish them. i feel like i am trying to do 2 things at once, almost ALWAYS. i never sit. i never relax. i can not just be.
jason's grandma called and gave me bad news about jason's mom, which i then felt necessary to pass on to him. it was late at night and i am telling him that his mom has lost her job, and is doing some bizarre behaviors that are landing her in trouble with the law. they are about 100% sure that she has joined a cult and it's getting scary. i am sure this information could have waited until morning, but i couldn't sleep on it. then he couldn't either. what was i supposed to do? not tell him all this crazy shit? would i want to know? ugh. then i tell him this, and he seems upset with me that i am upset by it. whatever.
so my mom and i are going to visit my grandparents in california. stress. the flights are super full. i can get there, but i can't get home. so i spent yesterday (3 hours) during nick's nap freaking out on my mom telling her i couldn't go and that i wasn't going to go and that was final. so then she asks me to just come to her house for the week and i'm like crazy screaming, "no! i am not going anywhere! i am staying at home. screw this." i am rivaling nick for his age. i am going through my own terrible twos, thirty years late. so she bought me a ticket home. see how easy that was? do you know, i stressed about this for hours. 3 clicks of a button, and i have a ticket. signed sealed and delivered by my mom. she must think i am losing it.
jason told me that he might get "moments of sadness" while nick and i are away on father's day. i started to laugh out loud when he said this. evil fills my veins. but seriously, moments of sadness? who are you?
this morning he went for another run. he's doing really well and i was proud of him until he chased me around the house trying to give me a morning hug all sweaty. i didn't have the heart to tell him that i had moments of sadness just thinking about hugging his sweaty ass.
nick's awake.

it's a date

2007-06-08T22:14:00.000-06:00

jason and i just got home from dinner & a movie. we haven't done that in a VERY l....o.....n.....g time!!! but it was fun. we went to piazza bella in roscoe village (yum) and then to see "knocked up." which was good, a little long, but good. we laughed alot. but i wonder if you haven't had a kid, would it be that funny? and then it was totally gross in one part, but the gross part is towards the end and you're not expecting it, so it's kinda funny too. whatever.

we are going to try to go out like this more often. we say that now, but let's just see...we also said we completely quit drinking 3 months ago, and well.......................

it's an expensive night out, babysitter was $50 on top of our dinner (bottle of wine) and movie. i remember the days when we would just spend that much and never even eat. we just drank and smoked our way through the city and took cabs everywhere. now we are eating dinner at 6:30 and going to a movie at 8. ha ha! it's 11:15pm, i should be in bed.

by the way, jason told me that he is going to write a book, about his life. i hope his story is so fucked up that people buy it. tons of people read that "million little pieces" and that shit wasn't even true.

ugh

2007-06-07T19:27:00.000-06:00

work really gets in the way of my personal life. i am not a fan.

not pregnant...

2007-06-04T12:36:00.000-06:00

so drinks are on me!!!! (like i even drink anymore). whatever.

have to work (?huh?) tonight. just made my family dinner so they won't waste away while i am gone. can you imagine? wouldn't that be crazy? you get home from work and your family is emaciated laying on the floor dying because you didn't leave them a proper meal? i have a sick brain.

ugh.

2007-05-30T13:42:00.000-06:00

we are trying to have another baby. we haven't been trying REAL hard, with all of the chaos in our lives...but, i am 9 days late for my period. ok, i know this is ALOT of information, but the reason i'm talking about it is because i think i am going to get my period and that i'm not pregnant. i think that i'm late because of all of the stress i've been under lately, and that sucks. i will be kind of disappointed if it didn't happen. here's the thing...i'm not on any time schedule. i am just ready now to do it and feel like let's get it going....but whatever, it is what it is. and that's ok.

p.s. i really can't stand the mom's at the park anymore. where are all the nanny's?

calm secrets sleepyhead...

2007-05-29T18:58:00.000-06:00

ok, so things are starting to calm down here. at least until jason decides to have his next episode.... hopefully we are done with all of this crap! oh, except my dad did leave me a message that my aunt (his sister Sandy) died today. she had a brain tumor and she lived several more months than they told her she would. she was only supposed to have a week or two left when they found out. he said that she didn't want a funeral, just cremation and then to have her ashes scattered out by where they vacation on the lake way up in michigan. such is life. i really didn't know her all that well. she always reminded me of her mom, my grandma. they looked like twins. i guess it's good that there is no funeral. i would be so nervous going, i always am when i am with that side of the family. they all know me, and ask about my brother and stuff and i barely can remember their names. i saw Sandy about 3 years ago at a family gathering, i didn't really hang out with her or talk to her that much, but she was always real nice to us. anyway, she's gone....

jason and i took nick out for ice cream today while mike was showing our house that isn't going to sell. geez, i shouldn't put that out there in the universe...i should say "our house will sell by the end of the month..." that is the "secret" isn't it? i haven't read the book or anything, but who needs to when you can just tivo oprah and learn? and if oprah wasn't enough, i sat next to some crazy guy on the airplane who told me that we were "meant" to sit next to each other because of the secret. (the secret is basically all about what you put out into the universe you will get back, or some crazy ass shit like that) anyway, i had to listen to this guy and how we were supposed to be sitting next to each other so we could discuss the universe and our purpose of being here at the same place at the same time, only up until i could find my ipod headset and tell him that my secret was getting some time to myself, and that the universe wanted me to have some alone time. seriously dude. i just plugged in my flight number and got this seat. anyway, our house WILL sell.

went to bed last night at 7:30. thinking about making it until 8:30 tonight. i have 9 minutes...

bad luck?!

2007-05-27T19:43:00.000-06:00

ok, so my cry for help didn't work. well, i didn't commit suicide....yet. my husband ended up in the hospital on friday, and came home today. he had a very bad staph infection, and he got it from (get this) pulling not ONE, but TWO, ingrown hairs. hello, didn't know pulling a hair could land you in the hospital over night. i pluck every freaking hair on my body, i squeeze every zit on my face, i even pick my nose, and this has NEVER happened to me...jason doesn't even so much as touch a zit and the one time he does touch TWO ingrown hairs, he's in the hospital?! he told me he's having a string of bad luck. when he said it, i started laughing so hard, i almost cried. he's been having one hell of a year....and it's only may.

2007-05-24T09:44:00.001-06:00

am considering suicide, this is my cry for help. my husband is HOME SICK (again.) why God, why?

stupid lady...

2007-05-22T11:50:00.000-06:00

ok, so i was at the shoe store with nick this morning. and when i was putting him in his car seat, i could see a car trying to park in the empty spot next to me, but on the passenger side where i was putting my son in his seat. so, i am thinking to myself, don't rush, just take your time and get him in tight and right because the lot is EMPTY and this person is crazy for squeezing in the spot next to me...but whatever. so, this person decides they've waited long enough and they HIT MY CAR door as they are trying to park. HELLO?! so, (i'm not hurt) and i say, (very nicely i must add...i know all of you who know me are waiting for some crazy ass tirade but i seriously kept my cool..) "um, lady that was so dumb." she looks at me and says, after a l....o....n....g..... pause "sorry." Huh?! i then say, "that was really stupid. you could see i was trying to put my son in his car seat, there are a ton of other open spots." and she then goes off, "ARE YOU CALLING ME STUPID?" and i say, "well, actually, yeah. you are stupid, that was a stupid thing you just did. i can't believe that you couldn't wait or go somewhere else. i see you have a kid in your car, you must know how it is." and then she just got irate and yelled at me. so then i had to get out of my car, and tell her i was calling the police and i wrote down her car make/model RAV4, and her license plate XMAS BBY (wtf?) yeah that's right, i put it out here online, screw her. then i went to the police station. well, unfortch i didn't get her name or her insurance information. (now who's stupid? whoops!) and the police woman said i should maybe try to get that first from my insurance before doing anything, cuz it might not be worth it. UGH. so here is the lesson....next time i get hit by some hormonal mom, pregnant and with her 4 year old in their SUV because they have no patience. i will not call them stupid. i will simply RAM them with my car so i feel better.
the end.

drinks anyone?

2007-05-18T11:55:00.000-06:00

so i had two drinks last night with a girlfriend...it was nice, but jack and 7 up just ain't right. must invest in some caffeine free diet coke or possibly a new drink all together. i didn't miss the hang over at all today. i was in bed by 11 and up at 720. what a beautiful thing. it only took me 10 years to figure this out....?!

dude look like a lady....

2007-05-17T11:47:00.000-06:00

so gabby, our neighbor who is 3 years old has a buggy type push car thing that every kid wants and every kids seems to have, except mine. but we already have a bike, a wagon, a stroller or two, and a ton of other crap in our basement--so we are not getting this push car thing--but since gabby has one, and she's gone during the day at school, we are borrowing it. AND, since she pushed nick down yesterday and busted his lip, chin and scraped up his face, well, i figure she owes us anyway. (i WAS watching him, and i only had one pina colada w/ gabby's mom) so today we took the buggy to the park. but here's the thing it's PINK. now i am sure nick could care less. he was in that thing so fast when i told him we could take it. i have never seen that kid move so fast! he probably thought i was just telling him he could get in it so i could get him to put on his coat. whatever, we took it to the park. but i have to say, we looked pretty dorky. we drove it by the pool and there were a bunch of men working on the grounds, they stopped us and wanted to talk. then one guy asked me, "so is he yours?" i thought he said, "is IT yours?" meaning the pink buggy that i have my SON in. i said, "OH NO, my neighbor's..." he said, "i know, no one out here belongs to the kids they are with, you guys are ALL nannies around here!" OH, wait...i thought you meant the PINK car we are driving around...yep, the kid with the blond hair, blue eyes and fair skin, yep he's mine. WHOOPS! like anyone cares (but me obviously) that you have your son in a pink car. whatever. we might take it out again later...and hey, the girls at the park really dug it. i may have just figured out a way to make nick a ladies man....

hungry?

2007-05-16T13:30:00.000-06:00

i can't stop eating. i just ate an entire bag of sunchips. i love those freaking things.

it stinks in here....

2007-05-15T20:20:00.000-06:00

so finally our exterminator came over. ok, should i start with what the problem was? first, why do i even have an exterminator? my exterminator? MY exterminator! yes, we actually have one. gross. once i get my head around that statement i'll be able to think clearly.

alright, we had these little baby flying bugs downstairs that we noticed about a week ago. and it's either me or them....so i call the guy to tell him i need help, i say, "they fly slow like they want me to kill 'em, they kinda look like moths, and they aren't really bothering me, but they leave marks on the walls, and hey, i really hate bugs." so my bug dude is all, "ok, no problem they sound like they are coming from the sewer and they are slime mold bugs." um, gross. slime mold? how does this guy know this stuff? i bet i could pick a bug from off the internet, explain to him what it looked like and he would know it. what a sick job. how do you get into that? anyway, he finally came today...i've been waiting a week. just killing slime mold bugs, don't mind me. so, george (bug dude) came over and he's like a mad scientist. jason and i really like this guy, he is so funny...without being funny or knowing how funny he is. he reminds me of einstien, crazy hair and all, and he is very smart, he's an entomologist (look it up) he ran for mayor (years ago), he has his PHD, and he's an entrepreneur...he's been in all types of businesses, the latest being honey. yep, after he mixed 5 potions to pour down our drain (all smelling of rosemary and evergreen?!) he then sold us a jar of honey. what? he told us he's a bee keeper (surprise) and he sells this honey for $7 a jar. "it has healing powers, and could help with arthritis." so i bought some for my mom. HI MOM. he gave us several first hand stories of how his honey has helped all kinds of people from several different maladies. maybe we're suckers for a guy who knows his bugs....maybe we're just suckers. so, $132 later we should be bug and sickness free thanks to george, the most interesting person to have walked in our front door and stink up our house. (well besides nick....)

a better day...?

2007-05-14T05:10:00.000-06:00

ok, so yesterday sucked until like 4pm. then jason and i had it out. it was good. i am glad we fight. seriously, i think fighting sometimes really lets all the crap out and then there is room for better stuff. we probably need to learn how to be nicer to each other when we fight, but hey at least we can say we're sorry and move on. man, he really hurt my feelings that time....and that is hard to do.

my mom and brother showed up at about 5 in the afternoon. we ordered thai and hung out all night. it was so fun. nick wanted to sit with matt, eat with matt, play with matt. so cute! nick also loved mitchell (12 year old cousin) at the party and kept walking up to him and putting his arms in the air as if to say, "hi mitch, pick me up please" but mitch was so totally not into him. it was pretty funny. mitch really did not want to have anything to do with him. i was cracking up. i was like, mitch hold nick. mitch take a picture with nick....he was so embarrassed. think it had to do with the 8 14 year old girls at the party????

i am up and it's freaking 6 am. my mom wanted me to take matt to the airport, so i got up at 545, then that bitch decided she was gonna take him. she crazy sometimes. oh well, my kid is up anyway. guess i'll go start my day....

mother's day....

2007-05-13T07:41:00.000-06:00

so i am not having the best mothers day....but tell me when you had the best valentine's, new year's eve, or some other holiday that you get all worked up for only to be disappointed. seriously, yesterday sucked and today hasn't started out any better. yesterday jason and i got in a huge fight and i am not even sure why. all i know is the day started out fine, then we went for a walk and i had an eyebrow waxing appointment at 9:30. i forgot my cell, so i told jason and nick that i would meet them in the park. i walked over to the park and then jason decided he was shaky and needed to go home to eat. fine. nick and i played for a little while longer UNTIL he decided to run through some pretty big puddles (fountain in the park) he got soaked and it was chilly so we went home. NOW, on the way home i was SUPPOSED to pick up jason's dry cleaning. (this is a NEVER ENDING SAGA, about his dry cleaning. seriously, i have so many fucking things on my plate, let me drop and pick up your dry cleaning every fucking day.) sorry, anyway...i didn't stop to pick it up because nick was soaked. when we got home i was going to change nick, and then go back out and get the stupid dry cleaning in the car. there was a lot there, and by the way am i a fucking pack horse? was i supposed to hang it off my back? I HAD NICK IN THE STROLLER. ok, so i get home and jason's not here, so we decide to play with the neighbor. when he finally comes home (with what looks to be a mothers day present, yippee.) he doesn't say anything about the clothes and i COMPLETELY FORGET. (again. like usual, sorry i was busy remembering everyone in his family's birthdays, sending presents, making phone calls, whatever else could be on my mind on any given day?) so, we do lunch, then i put nick down for a nap. take a shower, get ready...cuz we are on our way to my aunt's house for my cousins graduation (8th grade). well, nick wakes up early, and apparently jason is sleeping downstairs, but how do i know that? so i yell downstairs, "hey, nicks up, wanna get ready?" so, here's where the fun starts....now, i bring nick downstairs and plop him on jason, nothing unusual. i say, "hey, can you get ready, i'd like to get going, didn't know he'd be up so early..." i am merely stating that i would like to spend as much time possible with MY FAMILY. but he decided to say this, get ready, it's like the ipod letter...."you are the worst mother, you just drop off nick on me like this, this is so like you, i hate you and hope you die." HUH? needless to say, i ended up having a shitty day.

we went to the party, which was no kids, except nick. well, can you really enjoy yourself while watching your 1 1/2 year old at a party where there are no other kids? here let me give you the answer.....um, no. my brother was in town just to cook for this party. it was really nice and the food was awesome. but it was very hard to even speak to anyone because i was either worried about watching nick, or mostly worried that jason didn't think i was spending enough time with nick and he was doing all of the work. oh, yeah, did i tell you earlier that while getting ready for said party, jason says to me, " well how did nick get so wet at the park, were you on your cell phone talking to one of your friends while NOT watching him?" hey fucker, i forgot my cell, remember....? he's just an ass. most men are. how am i to make sure that my son is not like this or am i already doomed?

anyway, here i am blogging away at how pissed off and hurt i am, and it' s mothers day. whatever. i am sure that my day will somehow get better. nick and i made a huge batch of oatmeal bars and that was fun, i let him lick the beater and bowl. thank God jason wasn't there to see that, there are raw eggs in the batter. and he is the better parent. that is apparent isn't it? he even said yesterday that he thought he was a better parent. WHAT are you talking about, dude? i didn't know it was a competition. i have NEVER once thought that one of us was better at this than the other. WHO thinks like that? ugh.

so to all, happy mother's day. i am definitely having a happy one, can't you tell....i can't fucking wait for my birthday, or you know what....better yet, father's day.

no time.

2007-05-09T12:51:00.000-06:00

like i have time to blog about anything these days....we went to indianapolis this weekend to visit our families and to attend a funeral. we were constantly going. it was also our anniversary on the 5th, 6 years. my parents watched nick for us, so we could at least have dinner together--which was super nice. jason and i have been out a total of about 5 times alone in the last year and a half.

then i got kinda sick...some kind of stomach thing. it's not over yet, i called the doctor and she told me to stick to a bland diet and whatever i do, "do not have a juicy burger." (huh?!) all i can keep down is toast, crackers and tea. i want EVERYTHING i see. if i saw a juicy burger in someones hand right now, they'd probably have to fight me for it. i am STARVING, but not willing to spend the rest of the day ill.

our house is still on the market, so is the place next to ours. AND i have to get out of here for a showing at 2. we have some shopping to do for mother's day, so i think we'll get that done while the people who aren't going to buy our house take a look....

child prodigy, zits and sickness....

2007-05-02T11:25:00.000-06:00

so much has been going on, i feel like i am in a rush to do everything. this working for a living is REALLY cramping my style. let's see.....last week nick had some "mysterious" sickness that left him with a temp of 103.7. this week he went for his normal 18 month checkup and was fine. he usually talks all day long, but as soon as the doctor walked in the door he was like a mute. so then i am overcompensating, trying to get him to at least say 1 word. she's like, "so do you think he has 15 words?" i'm all, yeah, "he says, bike and airplane and boat and shoe, oh and he can say shoe in polish.." and he can say....blah blah blah, but i felt like a total liar cuz the kid wouldn't even say mama. i wanted to pinch him to get him to at least say "ouch". then as soon as she left the room, i opened a box of raisins and he says, "newman." thanks buddy, newman is the guy on the front of the raisin box. thanks for making me look like a total a-hole in front of the doctor and then you act like a prodigy when we are alone.
anyway, now i am sick. i have a cold that i am fighting with every type of over the counter medication possible. i have taken day-quil, ny-quil, tylenol sore throat, chloraseptic strips, halls drops, you name it. oh and like every vitamin possible, which i try to do on the sly not anywhere near jason because he swears that when i take echinacea and all of those vitamins, that i smell funny. whatever dude, i'm sick. i smell. i am going to take a nap right now, as a matter of fact. hopefully all of this medication i'm taking will also kill the zit on my face. what is going on? my skin has been REALLY bad lately. zits popping up left and right. for all the good i am doing my body, it's not responding the way i'd like. maybe i'll just go back to drinking jack and smoking so i can have clear skin again.
nap time....

still dry

2007-04-27T13:09:00.000-06:00

last night a friend of mine came over and if this would have been a month or two ago it would have been a COMPLETELY different night....seriously, we would have killed 4 bottles of wine and started watching Napoleon Dynamite, fallen asleep on the couch with the red wine spilling all over the ottoman....(sound familiar?) but this time we were having decaf tea at 10:30 pm and discussing voluntary surgeries. !!!? WHAT HAPPENED? i drove her home. huh? usually the end of the night at our house consists of us calling a cab, and someone stumbling out the door. and then the big pass out by jason and i, and then i wake up with all my clothes and shoes on and then i almost break my ankle when i have to jump out of bed to puke, because i forgot that i'm still wearing 3 inch heels. NOT ANYMORE.... and boy is it nice. we had a really good time, still laughed all night long and had some really great chamomile tea. ha ha ha!

took nick to chuck e. cheese's today with amy. had a great time. nick was really into a driving game. he was actually good at it. scary. he wanted to shift and steer and he had little reactions when he would hit the wall or a car or a person. it was pretty funny to watch. amy would either have him sit on her lap or at least she'd push the pedals for him while he drove. he's taking a nap now, and i'm sure amy is too.

lame idol....

2007-04-26T10:14:00.000-06:00

i am pretty much convinced that paula abdul and michael jackson are the same person and THAT was the highlight of that very boring idol.....el divo? huh?

so many things to blog about and so little time

2007-04-24T19:05:00.000-06:00

ugh, where do i start?

hmmmm, do i start with the crazed wackjob mom at the park today? do i begin with my sons 102.7 degree temperature? do i talk about the fact that I PAID my credit card last month in full TO THE WRONG CITIBANK account and now my account is frozen...(guess jenny yoo will figure that one out on her own tomorrow when she inputs my number and it gets DECLINED.) do i tell you about the fact that nicholas was scraped all the way across his neck and back by a rusty bike that the neighbor kid left out all winter, so then i had to call the doctor to find out if he's had enough doses of tetanus shots to keep him healthy? (hello, johnny depp's daughter. stepping on a rusty nail and now has liver problems....?!) or do i just start by being grateful that it was a nice day, and i was home with nick and we had a really good time? YEAH RIGHT!

i can barely stand it. but i have to tell you about this mom thing. jason wants me to get over it, but i almost had to lay this bitch out. ok, so nick likes bikes. when we go to the park, he doesn't play on the equipment until after he's checked out each and every bike on the playground. he also had a thing for strollers, wagons or anything with wheels. so we get to the park and we are checking out everyones wheels before we get into the sandbox. fine. no problems. then this mom comes with one of these radio flyer bikes. one that nick is VERY attracted to. he can spot this bike from blocks away and he patiently waits for them to turn into the park. then he coyly waits for a bit for the little girl to start playing on the equipment and then beelines it over to this bike. now, i have learned A LOT of playground etiquette in this short time i have been a mother. and this is how it is SUPPOSED to go....when you bring ANYTHING, i mean snacks, a bike, a toy, a hat, a ball whatever....when you are at the playground you share, AND, if someone touches your wagon, stroller, ball, whatever....you let them do it because it's no big deal and IT'S FAIR GAME. everyone knows this, and if you don't want someone touching your shit, then you don't bring it. PERIOD. it's part of growing up. and when it's time for you to leave and someone is playing with your stuff, you politely go over and tell them you have to go home and you ask for your stuff back. now, that is not so easy as some kids are not very good at asking for their stuff, or the kid who has your stuff doesn't get it and they cry. BUT, this bitch calls over to me as nick is sitting on her effing bike, and says, "um, i would really prefer that you not play on our bike, please get off." OH BUDDY, i was SHOCKED. i almost checked her right there. and if nick wasn't able to repeat every one of my words i would have spoken to her like i was a soprano (yeah that's right) but instead i just said, "oh, excuse me, i thought when you brought something to the park it was fare game...." and then i got my kid off her stupid bullshit bike. BUT then she had to say this, "thank you for respecting my wishes. i just don't want anyone on my daughters things." OH PLEASE LADY, shut up! i was so mad, so to bug her further, i put nick right on the same piece of equipment right next to her little girl on the slide, and prayed that he act like the boy that he is. and he did just fine. then i prayed that that little girl would try to play with our toys in the sand or she'd get into someone else's stuff. then jason showed up and made me stop. he got sick of me obsessing about it. so now you get to read it instead. thanks. all i can say is i feel sorry for that little girl, because she is so not going to be able to go to any parks without her mom alienating herself from all the other normal mothers and she will never have any friends. but whatever. like i care.
the end.

spongebob and band aids....

2007-04-18T19:00:00.000-06:00

not much to report today. our house is officially on the market. big whoop. um, what else....? nope, i got nothing. i am going to watch sanjaya NOT get kicked off american idol, and then catch up with jason. feel like we have not had a second to just hang out and talk since last week. bought nick a huge spongebob toy today, like he needed another stuffed animal. he looks like E.T. when he sits in a pile of his stuffed animals....it's funny.

having a hard time typing tonight, had my first (of what will probably be many) casualty of my new knives. i was cutting some cheese (HA HA HA!) (what am i four?) and i practically sliced off the tip of my middle finger. ok, it's just a flesh wound, but it bled alot. had to run upstairs for band aids, nick was down in the kitchen, i had pasta boiling on the stove, a knife on the counter, and i am bleeding all over our white bath towels and bath rug while desperately trying to open the package. why are band aids so freaking hard to open? when you REALLY need one, then you are tearing into the sucker with a vengeance, and then YOU RIP the band aid instead of the packaging, or you twist the sticky part onto itself and ruin the one you have successfully opened? i think that made my wound that much deeper.......

menu for the week, and voting sober.

2007-04-17T11:32:00.000-06:00

so i was supposed to go to work today for some "informational picketing," well it didn't happen. and, well, life did. we were out of diapers and nick decided to poop 3 TIMES before 9AM. nice. so i spent the morning at the grocery, (oh and cleaning up shit) so i just didn't make it in. wonder how many people did???

for this weeks menu we have:

tuesday: turkey tacos (yeah, these are becoming a regular around here. we love 'em and it's nice out and i don't feel like REALLY cooking tonight...)
wednesday: chicken with spinach & rice
thursday: turkey burgers/fries/corn on the cob
friday: tilapia/fries/green beans
saturday: chicken pot pie (oh my God, my family LOVES this one!)

anna has been watching nick, since steph is out of town and wouldn't you know it i have been flying now....she's been coming to the house and i must say i really am loving this. it's so easy, i don't have to do a thing! no packing nick up, no worrying about jason in the morning trying to get to work on time. nothing. wonder if i can make them both some kind of a deal.....? but i have to say, nick and i do miss abby and steph, AND we're jealous since they are on a sunny beach all week. lucky bitches.

voted for my alderman today. he better kill the lady with the dog pound in my backyard. or i am going to have to have my husband go all apple ipod on his shit.

having dinner with a friend tonight. had to tell her i quit drinking. she didn't even care, she must not be one of my good friends, 'cuz they would try to talk me outta that.

enough with the waking up all night, kid

2007-04-16T12:50:00.000-06:00

dude, this "going to work" thing is really taking a toll on my blog. how am i supposed to be "another wife" with all these great ideas and then not able to produce some results? i am seriously tired. don't i complain about that enough? well my kid has started this crazy thing of waking up SEVERAL times a night SCREAMING....so last night was it. i have had enough. jason and i have made the mistake of going in his room to sush him and pat his bottom till he falls back asleep...HELLO? we didn't even do this when he was a newborn. now what's our problem? ok, we thought it was teeth, and he was in pain at first. and, that could be...but every night? nope, sorry. i am done. we are shutting his door, we are shutting our door and he's gonna have to scream it out. i am sure it has become habit for him and now he "needs" us. well now he's gonna "need" therapy when he's 20 because we are not going to be there for him anymore. i know i sound bad and mean, but that's me, bad and mean. see what happens when you don't get enough sleep? marie osmand? brooke shields? katie holmes?

menu plan whoops! no more alcohol...

2007-04-12T19:00:00.000-06:00

i am so pissed, i just lost an entire post that i was writing and now i have to do it over.

argh! i just realized that i never posted a menu for the week on monday. i did however, make a meal plan and grocery shop and i have been cooking all week for my family. you are just not going to get the benefits of that this week....whoops!

went out for drinks with a girlfriend last night. had 3 glasses of red wine and that was way too much for me. jason and i have basically given up drinking (ok, HE'S given it up completely, i am trying very hard, but i have a relationship with a man named jack....) so, it was like 3 weeks ago that jason quit and so i just kinda followed suit. well, after not drinking for so long and then smoking a pack of smokes (allright, not a pack but it feels like a pack today) i was not feeling so hot when i got home. THEN in the middle of the night i woke up thinking i either needed to immediately puke or poop. neither happened, as far as i can tell. but i have to say, i am not such a fan of the drinking thing anymore. it's fun for awhile while you're in it, but then when you have to go home, feel bad, potentially (which i did) have to wake up in the middle of the night because your one year old is screaming (teeth) and then you still have to function at 7 for the morning routine. WITHOUT caffeine. why? did? i ? give? up? caffeine? whatever, i had a cup of tea. i wouldn't have been able to make toast without a cup of tea. anyway, now i am totally worried. i am so not up for going out anymore. how am i going to see my friends? i guess i'll still go, i'll just be the one nursing a drink and pounding the club sodas all night.

napping baby, bachelor's on....

2007-04-09T11:47:00.000-06:00

man, i am gonna like this schedule for nick if it sticks. yeah, it's a long time from 7-11:30 or so to have him awake, BUT...i so far like it. this morning we did breakfast, drove jason downtown, then came home went for a walk and even stopped at the park... and then i still had time to shower ALL before lunch. now he's a nappin' away. i have (hopefully) 2 hours now where i can do whatever i need to and then it's into the afternoon for us. we can run around town or do whatever needs to be done. i think this will be good for summer too. HUH? did i say SUMMER? yeah, right. summer is never coming. it's freaking snowing outside. all my friends (well, not ALL cuz' that would be crazy if they were ALL there) are at the cubs opener today. they are probably freezing their asses off. yeah and i said i'd meet 'em for drinks later...ha! jokes on you girls! i'll be in my warm house, making dinner and then sitting in front of my big screen t.v. watching the bachelor. you know i said it, i still watch that stupid show and i must say i totally love it. i love it when the girls fight over the supposedly "hot" bachelor. you know, none of those guys are that great. they're ok enough i guess (minus andrew firestone and that fisherman dude, byron?) but i really watch just to see those stupid girls fight. it's awesome and completely entertaining. i like to watch how messed up other people are, it makes me smile:)

Easter

2007-04-08T12:10:00.000-06:00

Happy Easter everyone.

so, we canceled our indy trip this weekend, we just couldn't do it this time. we will reschedule for another weekend coming up...sorry, folks.

since we were in town and MY family is here, i took nick to see them yesterday afternoon. my grandparents were in from california, so i wanted nick to see his great-grandparents, my grandma & opa (that's what i call him, opa....nope, we're not german. i just call him "opa," but i refuse to call my grandma "oma," cuz' that just sounds silly).
ANYWAY, nick and i went over to aunti's house to visit. nick had a very fun time and he really enjoyed his Easter egg hunt. but now i am pretty sure the dude is confused on why every egg he picks up doesn't have a treat in it anymore. he shakes the plastic egg, realizes that there's no cookie inside and throws it aside, and keeps on doing that through the whole basket. yep, he pretty much hates Easter now. just one lousy egg hunt and it's over. sorry dude. while i'm thinking about it, i am going to get those eggs and hide them in my closet so i don't have to explain (to a 1 year old, HA) why they are empty. good thing it's nap time.

fat, allergies & shopping

2007-04-05T13:49:00.000-06:00

so my mom is in town, helping us out right now...and the first thing i told her was that she looked like she put on some weight (!) it was so freaking funny...she took me serious (issues) and then said yes, she had put on a few pounds. ok, one more time LADY, YOU HAVE A PROBLEM, YOU WEIGH 100 LBS. PLEASE STOP. how did i not ever get some weird whacked out body image of myself with this woman raising me?

took a claritan this morning because i think i have allergies. now i am tired, so tired. is it because i woke up at 4:50 for work? is it because i (stupidly) quit caffine (almost) with my husband? or is it because i took that pill? my friend who gave it to me said it was one that you get over the counter and the kind that you couldn't make meth with, well that sucks, cuz i was gonna try to make some later today in my kitchen...right after making dinner for my family. yeah, you heard it here first, i quit caffine but am thinking of making meth with over the counter allergy medication.

think i'm gonna make my mom take me to target now. maybe she can buy me something new. maybe she can buy something for herself in the kids department....

2007-04-03T12:53:00.000-06:00

question: if i live for my son's naps, then why THE HELL am i trying to get him to only take one a day?

answer:
a. i'm crazy
b. i'm sick of putting him down for 2 very short naps and getting nothing done around here
c. i'm crazy
d. i'm crazy

seriously, i think one nap is not enough and two is somehow too many....
which makes me think of something funny a friend once said to me before i fell off my barstool out the window of a certain establishment in lincoln park (thank God we were on the ground floor, otherwise this story may have never been told) ...."martini's are like tits, one's not enough and three's too many." i just took a drink and laughed out loud while reading this. three boobs makes me laugh.

dinner menu for the week...

2007-04-02T13:45:00.000-06:00

here it is....you've all been waiting for it....

monday--chicken florentine/salad/maybe rice?not sure yet
tuesday--cheesy broccoli & red pepper rosti (recipe to follow)/salad/crusty bread
wednesday--easy paella (recipe to follow)
thursday--tortilla crusted taliapia/roasted veggies/salad(see my post from a couple of weeks ago about this...we eat it all the time, so good!)
friday--we will be in indy visiting family for Easter, so i'm lettin' them cook!

cheesy broccoli & red pepper rosti
serves 4

3 T vegetable oil
1 small onion, chopped
1 small red pepper, chopped
12 oz. broccoli, coarsley chopped
2 T water
1 t salt
2 1/2 lbs. baking potatoes (about 4 large)
1/4 t ground black pepper
4 oz extra sharp cheddar cheese, shredded (1 C)

1. in nonstick 12-inch skillet with oven-safe handle (or with handle wrapped in double thickness of foil for baking in oven later), heat 1 T oil over medium heat. add onion and red pepper and cook 6-7 minutes or until tender, stirring frequently. stir in broccoli, water, and 1/4 t salt; cover and cook 3-4 minutes or until broccoli is tender, stirring once. transfer broccoli mixture to medium bowl. wipe skillet clean w/ paper towels.
2.meanwhile, preheat oven to 400. peel and coarsley shred potatoes; pat dry with paper towels. in large bowl, toss potatoes with black pepper and remaining 3/4 t salt.
3. in same skillet, heat 1 T oil over medium heat. add half the potatoe mixture, patting with rubber spatula to cover bottom of skillet. leaving 1-inch border, top potatoes with broccoli mixture, then sprinkle with cheddar. cover with remaining potatoes, patting to edge of skillet. cook 5 minutes or until browned, gently shaking skillet from time to time to keep pancake from sticking.
4. place large flat round platter or cookie sheet upside down over skillet. grasping platter and skillet firmly together, very carefully and quickly flip skillet over to invert pancake onto platter. add remaining 1 T oili to skillet, then slide pancake back into skillet. cook 5 minutes or until browned.
5. place skillet, uncovered, in oven and bake 15 minutes or unitl potatoes are tender throughout.
6. serve in skillet or slip pancake out of skillet onto platter or cutting board. cut into wedges.

Paella
serves 4

1 box yellow rice
1 spicy sausage link, (like chorizo) diced
1 T oilve oil
1 C chopped onion
1 C coarsely chopped red bell pepper
2 large garlic cloves, minced
1 1/2 pounds medium shrimp, shelled and deveined
1 pinch saffron threads
1 C cherry tomato halves
1/2 C dry white wine
Salt & peper to taste
1 C frozen petite peas, thawed in a bowl of warm water for 1 min.
3 T coarsely chopped cilantro leaves

In a medium saucepan, cook rice according to package directions. Let sit, covered, 5 minutes. Meanwhile, in a large (10-12 inch ) non-stick skillet over medium-high heat, brown sausage; remove and set aside. Add olive oil to skillet over medium heat. Add onion, bell pepper and garlic. Cover and cook until onions are soft, about 2 minutes. Add shrimp, saffron, tomatoes and wine and cook, stirring, until shrimp is bright pink and just cooked through, about 2-3 minutes. Season to taste with salt and pepper. Add sausage and peas to rice and fluff with a fork. Divide rice among 4 bowls. Spoon shrimp and juices over rice and top w/ cilantro.

boring t.v. day...

2007-03-31T13:40:00.000-06:00

i've just decided that if you're a guy, it doesn't matter if it's raining, snowing, dark, or sunshiny outside...whatever....you can always find some crap on t.v. that interests you. i HATE saturday afternoon t.v. and you know what i hate worse? sunday afternoon t.v. i barely ever even watch t.v. anyway, just news once in awhile and then all my nighttime dramas (grey's, housewives, 24 & idol) but let me tell you, my husband could sit there all day and night and find something that interests him at any time. period. the HD discovery channel sometimes doesn't even show a show with a plot, just music and landscapes (like a airplane boarding video) and the dude is entertained. i am so bored i want to puke.

wait, here's how bored i was earlier....i suggested that we take nick (17 mos old, hello) to toys-r-us...just to walk around. I DON'T LIKE other peoples' kids, I CAN'T STAND the people who work there and i want to "walk around?!" huh? i just had to get out of the house with my kid and do something other than watch bad t.v. SO, then listen to this, i need a refill of my diaper pail bags, so i ask the girl who works there if they had any in the back because whenever i am there the shelf where they should be is empty. first she tries to tell me that the "diaper genie" refills will work--um, no. i don't have the diaper genie (by the way what is that supposed to mean, genie? like, poof, the smell of shit is now gone! HA!). anyway, so then she tells me that she can look in the computer and see if they have my "neat" (ha) bags in the back, BUT if they do, she can't leave the floor to get them for me (might have a toy emergency?) AND they are probably on a truck, so i won't be able to have them anyway. HUH? so i tell her don't bother looking unless you can get them for me now. and then she looks very confused. yeah, you read that right, she's confused because i tell her if she can't get me a product that SHE HAS in the back of the store, then don't bother looking in a computer to see if you have it. is that confusing? no, please don't tell me that you have 11 of these refills that i desperately need, but you can't get them for me nor can anyone else in the store because that would make me ANGRY. huh? and she's confused? well, i can tell you what i am not confused by, i am not confused at all by her vocational choice.

i know that wasn't so nice, maybe i've read jason's ipod letter a few too many times? ah, who cares? i'm publishing this anyway...

mean streak & teenagers....

2007-03-29T09:22:00.000-06:00

argh! so much is going on here, and so little time to talk about it! jason is feeling much better, he was just having some anxiety issues, and they are being taken care of.....not by me, 'cuz if it were up to me, i'd probably just mess with him for fun. i am not a nice girl. face it. i have.

nick is getting all 24 of his teeth at once. he looks like a country bumpkin with just 3 right now, but soon he's gonna look like jaws. wonder what he'll do when he can actually chew his food?! jason calls him the belly that walks like a man, he eats so much food now...he's like a teenager for real. he totally doesn't like to wake up, he wants to just laze around the crib, he eats us out of house and home, he found his penis and likes to give that a yank here and there... i gave birth to a 16 year old.

taking the teenager to lunch with a girlfriend today, hope it's her turn to pay....ha.

ER, a good book, and some dirt....

2007-03-27T09:22:00.000-06:00

so i am sure by now you have noticed that i didn't post a menu for the week yesterday. well, i was kinda busy with my husband being rushed to the hospital and all....he's fine, just needs to see his doctor today and we'll figure this whole thing out. the dude is in a constant state of dizzy, which gives him severe anxiety. i hope they prescribe him pills so i can take 'em too. i have so many funny things i could say here, but with respect for jason, i will not take the liberty to do so. (until he is diagnosed and then it's a free for all, as far as i'm concerned).

i read a great book over the weekend, "The Glass Castle" by Jeannette Walls. it was an easy read, but what a book. it's basically her memoirs, her childhood story, and it is amazing that she has turned out the way she has. her parents were so poor the kids slept in boxes, had to dig in the trash for food, and barely ever went to school. i can't do this book justice by telling you about it, you'll just have to read it. trust me....the last book i read was "The Dirt" by Motley Crue (yeah the band, you know you like tommy as much as i do AND i know why....) and it was great too. i am liking reading about other peoples' lives and their struggles. it makes having a hypochondriac husband not bad at all......JUST KIDDING, jason. i had to get one in, didn't i?

i'm hiring....

2007-03-25T08:58:00.000-06:00

poor jason, he just can't get a break, can he? ok, i am going to leave him alone today...well he hasn't done anything to piss me off yet, so he's safe for right now.

i am trying to get my calender set for next month already, it's crazy but we fill up our schedules fast around here. seriously, what will happen when nick's involved in every sport? or activity? i am already a professional planner and i still can't get it all in. i think i need an assistant, i still want another wife around here and come to think of it, maybe a cook.

snooze button please....

2007-03-24T08:32:00.000-06:00

i love getting up every morning with my kid, at 7 and starting our day. not sure when i am supposed to get a break, sleep in...etc. my husband however, apparently gets the weekends for that. guess i'll have to go to work out of town to get a day off? guess that's how it works when you're the mom. whatever. i am tired. and the worst part about it is, he totally doesn't get it, and i don't think the dude ever will.

pork chops, quiche & postpartum depression

2007-03-22T13:46:00.000-06:00

the pork chops recipe was pretty good and easy to clean up, because of the oven bag...but of course my darling husband had to get his two cents in...."well, i think it was really good, but maybe next time, i'd try searing the chops..." huh, i don't really remember asking him how to make the recipe HARDER or more TIME CONSUMING or to add ANOTHER step...did he miss my post about how great and wonderful it is to make dinner with a one year old up your ass? maybe he should take all of his extra time and READ MY BLOG.

the quiche was very good, and easy to make, although i do usually buy ready made pie crusts...i didn't this time. my crust was fine, but i always get nervous...and that is time consuming, but well worth it this time and will do it again...loved the chives.

all morning i was busy making the pasta for tomorrow and i did do a double batch. i made one for my friend who just had a baby last week. food was the best gift anyone ever gave us after nick. just thinking of preparing a meal when you have a screaming infant is enough to throw you into postpartum. just thinking about it is making me depressed.

teething toddler

2007-03-20T21:16:00.000-06:00

someone told me that i should try putting alcohol on my son's gums to stop the pain of teething....i am wondering why i would waste my whiskey....it's not like he's getting anything out of it, and then next time i'm up for a jack, i'm a glass short.

seriously, the best thing i have found are these crazy q-tip like things with ora-gel in them. i tried one out first and i have to say, if i'm out of whiskey one night, i might just try to snort one of those things.

mom is crazy again, think i might want to change some things...

2007-03-20T08:31:00.000-06:00

so yesterday i was talking to my mom and she told me she has lost like 6 pounds because she gave up chocolate for lent. then this morning i called her, and she was on the treadmill. HELLO, LADY...you weigh 100 pounds!!! where are you gonna shop? baby gap? or maybe you will have to fly out to hollywood and ask nicole richie where she shops? or possibly ask for her tailor's name? seriously, you need counseling.

this morning i told jason i am going to dye my hair blond and get some implants. not sure why, but i think it might make for a fun summer....i also told him i plan on buying a bunch of new clothes and shoes. i think i just want a makeover for real, i want to go on one of those makeover shows and have them make me look real cute. but, i don't really want to go on t.v. for that. and those bitches that do the makeover shows are not so nice to you at first. yeah, i think i will just get a new lipstick color instead. and come to think of it, i'm not so up for elective surgery and the upkeep of the blond hair. whew. i better call jason and tell him how much money i just saved!

dinner this week....

2007-03-19T09:36:00.000-06:00

so here are the recipes for the week:

by the way, i am exhausted...so don't get too excited for tonight's dinner plan...

monday-springtime quiche/salad
tuesday-chicken piccata with linguine (recipe to follow)
wednesday-turkey burgers(recipe to follow, i make these ALL the time!)/corn on the cob/salad
thursday-black bean & corn salsa pork chops/corn bread(jiffy is good)
friday-cheesy stuffed shells/salad/garlic bread (i am making 2 of these and freezing one for later)

chicken piccata with linguine
serves 4

8 oz. linguine
1 large lemon
1 lb. skinless boneless chicken breasts, cut into 1/4 inch thick bite-size slices
1/3 c. white wine (yay!)
2 c. small broccoli florets
1/2 t. salt, divided
1/4 t. fresh ground pepper, divided
1 T. all-purpose flour
2 T. extra-virgin olive oil

Prepare pasta according to package directions. Zest lemon, then juice it. Set aside. On a large plate, season chicken with 1/4 t. salt and 1/8 t. pepper. Lightly coat both sides with flour. In a 12-inch heavy skillet, heat 1 T. oil over high heat. Spread chicken slices in skillet and allow to sear 1-2 minutes, or until light golden. Turn chicken and continue to sear 1-2 minutes or until chicken is just cooked through. Remove chicken to plate. Add wine, lemon juice, and 1/3 C. water to skillet and bring to a boil, stirring to deglaze pan. Reduce heat to medium and cook, stirring, 3-4 minutes. Add broccoli, increase heat to high, and cook, covered, 1 minute or until broccoli is bright green and tender. Remove from heat. Return chicken to skillet along with any juices on plate. Stir in remaining oil, salt, and pepper. Divide linguine among four plates and top with chicken and broccoli mixture. Garnish with lemon zest.

turkey burgers
serves 4

1 lb. ground turkey
1 package of crumbled feta cheese-get whichever one you like, i like the one with sundried tomatoes and basil
1/3 C chopped onion (optional)
whatever fresh herbs you like you can throw in, or not...

mix all ingredients in a large bowl, form 4 patties
grill (i use a george foreman grill and a meat thermometer, it takes like 7 minutes a patty. if you use a "real grill" it takes alot lot longer...
toast up some buns...there you go turkey burgers...
i also throw some french fries in the oven while they are cooking and some corn in a pot.

ok, good luck, let me know what you think....i am going to try to take a nap. dude i am done.

naps, pad thai, and knives....

2007-03-16T08:21:00.000-06:00

ugh. so yesterday didn't go at all as planned. surprise surprise with a 16 month old. ha. anyway, the dude wouldn't nap in the morning...he slept in 'till 8....which is NOT happening again, unless i have a date with my friends jack or merlot the night before. we missed lunch with my friends. then he only took a 2 hour nap in the afternoon and that was it. no breaks for the mama.

today is a different story. he was up at the normal time (7) and now he's down napping. this schedule works for me him best. and that is all that matters.

made the pad thai last night. super good. had to fight with jason during the cooking process. he was worried the noodles were undercooked....(get the eff out of the kitchen dude.) he did buy me 5 new global knives yesterday. I LOVE THEM. and i would be devastated if one fell off the counter onto his toe if he ever "tests" a noodle again while i'm in the middle of something.

2007-03-15T08:47:00.000-06:00

i'm gonna start calling my toddler, "the king." he slept in until almost 8 am today! now i hope he's taking a nap, i need to get stuff done...i live for naps.

ok, so shake-n-bake is kinda ghetto. sorry. i thought it was a good idea, and we used to eat it all the time, but now not so much...especially now since i am cooking more often and better stuff. there are so many better things to do with pork. (ha)

going out to lunch with some friends today. we love a place called victory's banner. it's vegetarian. ever think about the name of a restaurant? how did they come up with that? what the hell does that have to do with vegetarian food? what does that really have to do with food at all? well, whatever, that's the name. too bad that's all i will be thinking about the whole time i'm in there.

cooking for the family...

2007-03-14T09:04:00.000-06:00

so is anyone out there using my recipes? just checking....they really aren't MY recipes...they are ones i find, so no hard feelings. i'm just wondering if i am the only one out here cooking for my family every night. my husband sure is getting used to it. that's a double edged sword. the dude is walking in from work, expecting dinner. WTF??? it can't be ready and on the table EVERY night....hello?! i have a life. AND not to mention, i have a 16 month old up my ass the whole time i'm trying to make anything. here try this sometime....take every kitchen gadget, including all of your wooden spoons, pots and pans, strainers (whatever) and throw them all over your kitchen floor, put most of them in front of whatever space you will be working in most. now, put some oil in a pan and try to cook whatever it is you have WITHOUT grease splattering over the side, and then take a pint sized person and attach them to your butt by their nose. now walk to the fridge (you forgot an ingredient) don't step on a spatula (you'll have to wash it later) and sing the ABC's over and over, but only get to E every time because now you have to bust into O'l McDonald E-I-E-I-O.
and some might wonder why my best friend is a guy named jack?

jason's horoscope...HA.

2007-03-13T14:16:00.000-06:00

so i am reading over the msn horoscopes...and here's his....

Leo
July 22 - August 22Your actions are likely to be driven by a great sense of duty towards your fellow man, dear Leo. Think about yourself as being an important role model for young people who may be looking up to you without you even knowing it. Make sure you hold yourself straight and proud regardless of how menial a task you may be engaged in. The example you set is likely to have a trickle-down effect that will end up touching many people.

think they read my blog?

ipod fight

2007-03-12T09:41:00.000-06:00

so yesterday i checked my email only to see this...

Dear Rachael,

I understand you are experiencing some issues when you try to figure out how to convert your AAC file to and MP3 format. I acknowledge how interesting this topic can be and I am more than happy to help.
Please understand that we are here to work with you and would love to delight you in anyway we can. Your email was not so polite. That was alright. We won't hold it against you and I would really enjoy the challenge of changing your experience. Please check out the following links:
blah blah blah...
I hope these articles provide a path that will lead you to your resolution. If not, I am extremely sorry. And, I recommend that you reply back to see if there is any other questions we can help with.
Thank you very much for your involvement with the iTunes Store. Apple appreciates your business.
Sincerely,
Brandon

so i'm like, HUH? what email....???? only to scroll down & see this....

customer First Name : Rachael
email : xxxx
Web Order # : xxx
Support Subject : Burn
Sub Issue : Audio CD
iTunes Account Name: xxxx
Comments:

Are you f***ing kidding me? I can't burn music I PURCHASED to an mp3!?!?!?!? I own the f***ing music now, I can do with it whatever I want! Apple is the devil, you have ruined everything music should be about. Maybe you should call the device the FU-pod which is what you're doing to your customers. What a f***ing joke, thanks for ruining everything that was good about the internet and music. Tell Steve J. he can kiss my a** I'm putting this locked down piece of s**t on Craig's list today. You have a lot of nerve with your stupid Mac vs. Windows commercials, you guys are one million times more evil than Microsoft. Thanks for noting, I will NEVER purchase another thing from the iTunes store.
F**k off.

holy sh*t. I DID not write that. that doesn't sound like me...but guess who it sounds like????

my husband.

(microsoft evil? steve j? whaaaat????)

what the HELL was he thinking? i can tell you what he was doing. he was using OUR ipod, registered under MY name and it was probably real late and he was real drunk.

I am mad.

weekly dinner plan...

2007-03-12T09:14:00.000-06:00

ok, so here it is.....
monday--creamy rice, chicken & spinach dinner
tuesday--shake & bake pork chops(yeah, we like shake & bake)/veggie/salad
wednesday-- pad thai (i buy this one in a box it's SUPER EASY & SO GOOD! i use tofu)
thursday--crockpot beef burgundy
friday--tilapia with lemon dill sauce/brown rice/veggie (recipe to follow)

Tilapia With Lemon Dill Sauce
serves 4

1 C chopped shallots
1/2 C thinly sliced black olives
4 fillets tilapia (or white ruffy)-thawed
4-5 T butter
lemon juice (1/2 fresh lemon)
1 T fresh dill
1/4 C whipping cream
3 T grated parmesan cheese
3 T breadcrumbs

Preheat oven to 400. Spray baking dish w/ Pam. Mix shallots & olives in a bowl, season w/ salt and pepper. Spread mixture in single layer in baking dish. Pat fillets dry w/ paper towel & lay in single layer on top of olive mixture.
In a small skillet over med. heat, melt butter until it becomes light brown & smells nutty. Remove from heat & add lemon juice, dill & cream. Add salt & pepper to taste. Immediately pour mixture over fish in baking dish.
In a small bowl, mix together the cheese & breadcrumbs. Sprinkle over top of fish.
Bake for 15-20 minutes in oven until fish is cooked & cheese topping is browned.

**I have made this recipe a shitload of times...it is seriously SO good....sometimes i don't have whipping cream, but we always have half & half or whole milk around, so i just use that....also, i find that i have to bake it a little longer than 20 minutes--like 25--AND i use the juice from the whole lemon, but we like it that way, lemony--you do whatever you like:)**

men are babies...

2007-03-10T09:02:00.000-06:00

so nick is not the only baby in the house. i think my husband might be more of a baby than my one year old today. what happens to a grown man? how can he have such babyish problems? he is mad 'cuz i didn't leave a box of wipes OPEN for him, he had to physically open a box of wipes while changing a poopy diaper HIMSELF. and he is the one changing the time zone system at work...? you better check your blackberry's tomorrow....

banana split

2007-03-09T15:32:00.000-06:00

think it's ok for your one year old to enjoy his own banana split the size of his head? well, apparently i do, so nick enjoyed a very large ice cream treat today. thought he might puke after eating a man sized taco, but then thought, he's been such a good boy and he's been cooped up in the house all winter and it's almost 60 degrees outside....let's indulge....
took him to the park to work off my calories and now he's taking a man sized nap.

time change

2007-03-09T10:28:00.000-06:00

so jason is serious about his work, he was up all night and is working from home on this mess...here's a short article about whass goin' on....

dvr/tivo

2007-03-09T09:10:00.000-06:00

um... hello, why do they show reruns anymore? doesn't everyone have a tivo? and if you don't, you can watch missed episodes of anything (good) online. i need to speak to someone at the top.

target & daylight savings....

2007-03-08T20:09:00.000-06:00

do you think it's bad if you spend more than you make at TARGET? i don't......

the tofu ended up tasting pretty good, my baby daddy ate it and that's all that mattered tonight. he's been working like crazy, something about the time change, and blah microsoft blah, patches, blah....all will be right with his world as soon as the clock ticks and tocks the correct time zone on his computers at work.

it's a good night for t.v. and i'm going to watch it all....and maybe eat a cookie.....

steak salad

2007-03-08T09:16:00.000-06:00

that steak salad i made last night was good! i used a skirt steak (which i thought was expensive before tasting it, but now not so much....$9.50/lb.) i made the recipe exactly how it was supposed to be. i would change just a few things....first i might try marinating the meat in some limey marinade, like some limes and some vinegar and oil (?) also, i would add some 'shrooms (which i did) and some avocado....and some croutons....what's a salad without croutons? nick (my 16month old) ate everything (surprise).
we watched american idol last night, and that antonella barba (or whatever her name is, but you know who i'm talking about) sucked. but i totally liked her outfit and jason had to get in a "she's hot" during her song. anyway, she's out. she is totally a shit singer, but she shouldn't worry, i think hef will try to get her to move into the mansion this week, then she'll never have to open her mouth sing again.

food for thought...

2007-03-07T14:29:00.000-06:00

i think if your friend comes over for lunch, and she brings a plate of cookies, it is perfectly acceptable to eat the entire plate...especially if you plan on having tofu for dinner. it practically cancels out the calories.

chicken noodle soup, zucchini, and vodka...

2007-03-07T09:32:00.000-06:00

so i forgot to say, i am a day behind on my recipes for the week (remember, we ran for the border on monday) . but last night i did the rotisserie chicken and for a veggie i used some zucchini that looked good at the grocery. jason loved it--so it must be good. i heated some oil in a pan, threw in half an onion, let it cook a minute, threw in 1 clove garlic, cook another min, threw in 3 cut up zucchini, tossed it with some dried italian seasoning, salt & pepper, and then at the end thought it didn't have enough flavor so i added 1/2 tomato all cut up. sprinkled it with some fresh grated parm cheese....yum.
anyway, i know that with some of these recipes for the week i will have some leftover veggies and i have 1/2 of that chicken still, so i am going to throw it all in a pot and let it go...i might try to freeze it...can you freeze chicken noodle soup? probably, i think you can freeze anything, 'cept vodka;)

2007-03-07T09:21:00.000-06:00

yesterday i got everything done that i needed to do for the week, thanks to my "other wife." she is pretty great. i ran all over the place, and she sat in the car with nick when i needed just to run into the dry cleaner, or do a return at a store. then she watched him while i went to the grocery. everyone should have one (another wife) i'm tellin' ya. the only downfall of this could be that your kid starts to like the other person better than you...which i am pretty sure is happening.....
he also likes my other girlfriend better than me too. i went to pick him up there the other day, and he wouldn't let go of her. i keep telling myself it's 'cuz they give him cookies for lunch:)

chicago in the winter

2007-03-06T23:19:00.000-06:00

ok, so it's late, but jason is working and i happen to be up for a sec and i just looked outside and it's SNOWING AGAIN. haven't we had enough of this? i can't quit thinking that maybe we should not move to the suburbs, but to an entirely warmer climate. like why did my family have to be from the midwest? couldn't we have been from a warmer place, somewhere in the south? but then we'd say things like "ya'll" and "fixin"........well that just did it...... i am looking out my window, hoping for another inch.

taco bell

2007-03-06T10:19:00.000-06:00

oh who am i kidding? i didn't even get close to the grocery last night. nick slept way late and by the time we would have gotten to the store it would be time for dinner. jason came home starving, so we ran for the border. jason got his tacos without cheese...yuck. that's part of his diet...i got mine the right way, supreme....which IS on my diet (what diet?). nick is a big fan of the beans and cheese, and he had a taco too! we'll try to get on a healthier track today.

weekly dinner plan...

2007-03-05T15:22:00.000-06:00

here it is.....

monday-i am running so behind. i am going to do a rotisserie chicken from the grocery, already warmed and ready to go, salad and couscous. ....DONE.
tuesday-warm steak and potato salad (recipe to follow)
wednesday-asian quickie stir fry dinner, looks good, with tofu! and i'm adding spinach & carrots.
thursday-crock pot beef strognaoff (seriously easy and tastes so good...i make the "no yolk egg noodles" with this) also, i add about 1/2 a package of fresh mushrooms to this in the beggining of the recipe.
friday-spicy sea bass(recipe to follow)/salad/green veggie

Warm Steak & Potato Salad:
serves 4

16 tiny red or white potatoes (1 lb.)
1 lb. lean sirloin steak, about 1 1/4 inches thick, trimmed of fat
8 cups mesclun greens (about 6 oz.)
1 pint cherry tomatoes, halved
2 T. minced shallots
1/2 t. salt, divided
1/4 t. freshly ground pepper, divided
2 T. extra virgin olive oil
1 T. red-wine vinegar
1 T. dijon mustard
1/4 t. dried tarragon

Preheat broiler. Place potatoes in a saucepan; add just enough water to cover. Bring to a boil over high heat. Reduce heat to low, cover, and simmer 10 minutes or until potatoes are tender when pierced with a knife. Drain and cover to keep warm.
While potatoes are cooking, place steak on a nonstick broiler pan. Season both sides with 1/4 t. salt and 1/8 t. pepper. Broil 4 inches from heat for 6 minutes on one side, then turn steak over and broil to desired degree of doneness (5-6 min for medium rare.) To test for doneness, make a small cut in thickest part. Transfer steak to cutting board.
Meanwhile, divide mesclun, tomatoes, and shallots among 4 plates. Cut warm, unpeeled potatoes into quarters. Slice steak into 1/4-inch-thick pieces. Divide steak and potatoes among plates. In a small jar, combine oil, vinegar, mustard, tarragon, and the remaining salt and pepper. Drizzle dressing over salads.

Spicy Sea Bass in a Flash:
serves 2

2 6 oz. fillets of sea bass, cod or other firm white fish
1 small onion, sliced
1/2 C. pitted chopped green olives
1 12 oz. can whole peeled tomatoes
1/2 T. olive oil
Salt & pepper
1/2 C. white wine (get something you like, cuz you're drinkin' the rest...)
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 t. crushed red pepper

1. Heat a large saute pan over medium-high heat. Add the olive oil.
2. Season the fish w/ salt & pepper. When the oil is hot, add the fillets flesh side down and cook for 3 minutes, until a crust has formed. Remove the fish from the pan and set aside.
3. Add the wine and onion to the pan and cook for 3 minutes. Add the olives, tomatoes, garlic, and red pepper and cook for another 3 minutes. Season w/ salt & pepper.
4. Return the fish to the pan. Baste the fillets with the simmering tomato sauce. Cook until the flesh flakes with gentle pressure (5-7 minutes).

ok, so i have to go to the store still and get this show on the road. good luck with the recipes and dinners! let me know what 'cha think....

yummy

2007-03-03T14:56:00.000-06:00

have i said how good my frittata was? just checking....

spinach and goat cheese frittata

2007-03-03T10:09:00.000-06:00

why haven't you made this? seriously, it is SO good. jason loves it. i love it. it was so super easy to make...hello, i made it with a raging hangover in like 15 minutes. the recipe is in last monday's post. (by the way, i used a goat cheese with herbs...)
thinking of putting the condo on the market (!!!!) we are crazy and never know what the hell we are doing or where we are going, but this time we mean it. ha.

i am awake

2007-03-02T23:58:00.000-06:00

why am i awake right now? it's late. i need to go to bed. thought of some words that make me laugh today. fatso is one of them. fatso is just a funny word.

i have a headache

2007-03-02T09:45:00.000-06:00

i was up SUPER late last night with two of my best friends...one of them is named jack (surprised?) and the other shall remain a mystery...
i had a blast but i hurt and am paying for it now. thank goodness nick is taking a nap.
but being the "good" wife that i am, i made that stinkin' frittata just now, so my family has something good to eat tonight...so, you see i didn't make it last night...oops... nick and i did leftovers and jason was on a date (dinner and a movie with a friend, hey that sounds like a date to me, so that's what i'm calling it...)
i have a headache...ouch....

food for thought...

2007-03-01T09:20:00.000-06:00

so i get an email from my husband this morning and in the subject line it says, "great news for you, rach" . click on it. then come back here and read on....
so is he trying to tell me something? yes, we are planning on having another baby at some point, yes, i do like an occasional oreo, box of brownies or some cake, but what is he doing to me???? AND furthermore, why is he out there reading these articles when he hasn't stopped by to check my blog? i think he is afraid, and now he should be....

welcome shanghai!

2007-02-28T19:53:00.000-06:00

seriously, i am so into this blogging thing that i check to see how many hits i get almost hourly (ok, not really, then who would be watching my kid?) but i do check it often, i started this thing like a week ago and i have had over 100 hits! sweet! and i am now international...i've been viewed in shanghai! (it was probably an accident, but hey, who cares? maybe they are coming back for recipes on monday....) seriously, i'm learning alot about the web and how to put in code (huh?) and i'm addicted.
jason is on a diet, he's counting calories, i asked him how much he wants to lose and he said 100, which would put him at 87 when he is done. i think he needs to befriend nicole richie or one of those funky twins. i can't stop thinking of what an 87 pound, 5 foot 10 man would look like. i could kick his ass.

nick's new career path, early bedtime & new mom's...

2007-02-28T10:06:00.000-06:00

ok, so the museum was totally worth it. nick had a blast, couldn't get him out of any of the cars that he could play in....wish we had one of those in the basement....seriously, he just wants to drive the bus, train, whatever it is that has a steering wheel. wonder if this is a sign he's NOT going to be a dentist??? (ha)
so, then last night jason and i are in bed by 8:30 again (second night it a row) and now i'm wondering how can we be so tired...like is there some kind of gas leak that is making us all so sleepy or did someone put something in our food? and then i came up with the answer...duh, we have nick. the dude does not stop until you make him, he's all over this place and i am exhausted from chasing him around.
meeting two of my pregnant friends for lunch, think i should tell them how much fun the first couple of months are with a newborn? i am evil.

children's museum, we are tourists today....

2007-02-27T09:29:00.000-06:00

today we are going to the children's museum. can you tell i am over winter? i keep taking nick to germ infested touristy places...but what the hell? we need something to do that is inside and fun. i am not one of those gymboree moms and i don't see myself joining some mom group, so this is what we are gonna do. maybe we'll hit all of the chicago "things to do" that you don't do when you live in the city, but you do when you have out of town visitors. we'll check 'em all out and then when you come to visit us, we'll be like, "yeah, we've been there..." nick will have been to the top of every skyscraper in chicago before he's two.

gubb this, grocery carts & harry houdini...

2007-02-26T14:31:00.000-06:00

seriously, i can't believe i was excited about that website. i must have been on some kind of "computer geek high" thinking i was going to input all of my grocery items in the computer, then email it to myself, then print it out, or text it to myself at the store. yeah, right. i just got out my pen and paper, made my list as usual, and i was out the door. i should know myself by now, if there is more than one step to ANYTHING i need to do, i will find a way to omit that task for good.
my grocery has these carts that you can rent for $1, you put your kid inside and the t.v. comes on and they are supposed to be entertained. i tried it for the first time today. it's more compact than the cart we usually get (free) which has this huge car on the front, so when we get that one, we just take out unsuspecting shoppers. and if i'm not paying attention and park him too close to the shelf, there is usually a page for a clean up in whatever aisle we've been to. whoever designed this giant car that is hard to navigate, with no cover on the "window" to keep body parts inside does not have a kid.
so, after watching all the other parents with this new expensive $1 cart, lolly gagging around the store with their sweet children so quietly listening to the t.v., not ripping shit off the shelves, i thought i'd spring for it. of course, houdini figured a way out, and we were back in the old boring cart again....i'm totally gonna design a cart....but only if there's only one step involved.

This weeks dinner plan

2007-02-26T09:17:00.000-06:00

ok, so here it goes:

monday-pork cordon bleu/salad/veg
tuesday-tofu noodle bowl(use whatever protein you want, the recipe is for beef)
wednesday-turkey taco's
thursday-spinach & goat cheese frittata (no link, recipe to follow...)
friday-tortilla crusted tilapia/couscous/broc (i'm not using the tilapia recipe here, because my grocery sells one already made that is awesome, but if yours doesn't this recipe sounds almost exact. also, if you can't find it in your store, try market day they sell the same kind as my grocery store.

spinach & goat cheese frittata: serves 4
use a cast-iron skillet or skillet w/ ovenproof handle

4 red or white new potatoes (8oz)
3 large eggs and 2 large egg whites
1/2 cup chopped onion
9 oz raw spinach, about 9 cups
2 oz goat cheese (plain or with herbs) about 1/2 cup
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon fresh ground pepper
1/2 teaspoon dried oregano
2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil

1. preheat broiler.
2. cut unpeeled potatoes into 1/4-inch-thick slices. place potatoes in a saucepan and add water to cover. bring to a boil. reduce heat to low, cover, and simmer 3-4 minutes, or until potatoes are tender when pierced w/ a knife. drain potatoes in colander; set aside.
3. in medium bowl, whisk whole eggs, egg whites, salt, pepper and oregano.
4. in a 9-inch skillet, heat 1 tablespoon oil over high heat. add onion; saute 1 minute. add spinach and saute 2 minutes, or until leaves are just wilted. add potatoes and mix well; spread evenly in skillet.
5. drizzle remaining oil around the sides of skillet. pour in egg mixture. cook 2 minutes, or until eggs just start to set at edges. sprinkle goat cheese evenly over the top of the frittata.
6. broil 4 inches from heat for 1-2 minutes, or until top is puffed and golden. using a paring knife, loosen frittata from sides and cut into 4 wedges.

so, my shopping list isn't too bad. these dinners are all easy to prepare and pretty healthy. i always use whole wheat pasta and mostly organic ingredients.
good luck and let me know what 'cha think.

p.s. anyone notice i did fish on friday? that's for all of you "good" catholics;)

gubb list. grocery list made easy.

2007-02-25T09:27:00.000-06:00

i just found this website www.gubb.net it's called the Gubb List, it's awesome! i usually have a running list just laying around the house and i have a dry-erase board on my fridge that i jot down grocery items that i know i will forget next time i go, but this system is really cool. so say you are at your desk (worker bees) and you need to make a grocery list, just go to gubb, fill in the list and you can email it to yourself and print it out, or if you forget that printout, you can text it to yourself OR if you have a phone that does internet services you can just pull it up when you need it. (i'm guessing if you work in an office you have one of those fancy phones that you can do all of that stuff and your company gets the bill:) for all of you who don't have the office job, and pay your own bill you might not have the internet service but i know you are still online and can fill out your list when you need it and then print it out before you leave the house!

a great lesson for my one year old. lovin' leo...

2007-02-24T23:21:00.000-06:00

since jason was hungover all day, nick and i rode the wave....we ate like we were hungover, and it was fun. i made brownies for his afternoon snack (he didn't seem to be missing his usual, goldfish/raisins/cheerios) and then for dinner we ate pizza & bread sticks. i had ordered a salad, but no one was interested in that---just the junk please.
it's gross outside. snowing or sleeting or whatever that is....it's loud i know that much, it's driving me crazy on the skylight...i hate skylights for so many reasons. maybe i'll list them tomorrow.
watched THE DEPARTED tonight, wanted to see ALL of the nominated movies before the oscars. good thing that worked out. (ha!) leo was hot and jack still has something--maybe it's just his name:)

lunch plans, ipod dancing and winter storms...

2007-02-24T09:37:00.000-06:00

taking nick out to lunch today with some friends today while my husband sleeps...he was up until 4am working/drinking/singing along with his ipod (a little too loudly, hello 3 am... i had to tell him to tone it down--at least he was using the headphones...know what? next time i will video tape it and then you can see for yourself what i am dealing with.) we are going to cafe irazu it's a costa rican joint. my one year old likes it, and we gotta get out of here before we are stuck in this house for a week when this "BIG winter storm" hits. they have been talking about it all morning on the news. do we really need another blizzard? isn't one a year enough?

trying to watch t.v. on the computer, it's NOT working

2007-02-23T22:51:00.000-06:00

my friend (hello, amy) told me i could watch episodes from my favorite t.v. shows online. like instead of going downstairs to the tivo, i can watch desperate housewives online in bed on my laptop. 47 minutes later, i am writing this blog instead of watching my show. i have been drifting off every so often waiting for the show to load. then i get an error message that i don't have enough bandwidth, right, whatever, i live with the computer geek...he's downstairs right now working on some crazy thing he won't even bother explaining cuz it won't make any sense and then i just waste his time and mine by acting interested.
the chicken tetrazzini i made was really good. i am planning on posting a new dinner menu for the week by monday.
i'm going to bed.

meatloaf (the meal, not the fat guy) gets two thumbs up

2007-02-23T09:20:00.000-06:00

so you should totally try this recipe, (it's on monday's post) it took me about 8 minutes to put together. i had also started out the week thinking i would make the potato spears but i didn't cuz they need to be in the oven for an hour and at a different temp than the meat...so i made some french fries that only take 15 min and cooked some asparagus on the foreman. i will count this as a success since not a grilled cheese sandwich was in sight.
i fell down the stairs last night, (maybe a little anxious about what would be happening to meredith on grey's anatomy?) jason was right behind me and i had a jack daniels in my hand (my first, so it wasn't jack's fault i fell) anyway, i totally fell, i have rug burn on my arm, i even hit my head, some of my drink was on the wall...good thing he made me a tall one... otherwise this story would end in disaster.

oreo's & meatloaf

2007-02-22T14:10:00.000-06:00

i just ate 3 oreo's, but they weren't OREO oreo's they were these organic sandwich cookies that look exactly like oreo's and taste like oreo's, but since the packaging isn't oreo and the name isn't oreo, i feel like i ate something healthy. WHAT? i think they don't count since they aren't REALLY oreo's. (and they're organic) whatever.
made the pork dinner as mentioned in my monday post. it was good. i used brown rice and pea pods and lots of thai hot sauce to kick it up. nick (my 1 year old) wasn't a fan so jason made him a cheese sandwich and i freaked out on him for slathering it with butter before slapping it on the foreman. kinda makes the whole oreo thing seem worse now. last night while my "fat" mom was here (read about her lobotomy in yesterday's post) i made the turkey pot pie, i will totally make that again, but i'll try making my own crust. that was good and easy and in a pinch will make it again and again.
trying meatloaf tonight. sounds nasty. but jason says he really likes it. we'll see, it'll probably be cheese sandwiches slathered in butter for everyone.....

2007-02-21T19:03:00.000-06:00

so my mom is in town today, and all she can talk about is getting lipo. she weighs about 108, so i told her she should shave her head "a 'la britney" and prepare for a lobotomy....maybe that is what britney is up to?? seriously, she keeps pushing her stomach out and scrunching her skin together so she looks like she has some fat, then she tells me that is what she would have sucked out. i think someone sucked her brain out....

2007-02-20T15:30:00.000-06:00

why is it whenever i get into the car to go somewhere, my gas light goes on. i am ALWAYS late for everything, so i don't stop for gas on the way...then i am usually in a hurry to get home so i don't want to stop to get gas then either. i barely even ever drive. we live in the city. where do i even go? seriously i am not very far from my place anyway, so if i run out of gas, i'll just walk.

went to the shedd aquarium, nick ran around like a fool. he kept trying to show me how fishies swim while flailing his arms all over the place. he liked the benches in the middle of the rooms with tanks on either side of the walls the best, he just wanted to climb up and get down again... he is only one you know.

2007-02-20T10:34:00.000-06:00

last night i made that foil pack chicken dinner. didn't think it was that great. my breasts were huge (CHICKEN breasts, that is) and maybe that was the prob. anyway, tonight is another meal and i'll try again.
taking nick to the shedd aquarium today since it's free admission this week, will just have to pay for parking, and a $15 sandwich at the food court (ha).

this weeks dinner plan

2007-02-19T11:13:00.000-06:00

so here it is, this is why i even created this blog in the first place....

monday-foil pack chicken & mushroom dinner/couscous/salad
tuesday-saucy stir-fried pork /brown rice
wednesday-deep dish chicken pot pie (i'm using turkey breasts)/salad
thursday-meatloaf?/potato spears/green veg
friday-chicken tetrazzini/green veg

this week they are all from the kraft website. i am into this magazine i keep getting from them, they have the best ideas. i change the recipes a little. we eat alot of organic foods in our house, we also don't do white rice--i just change it to brown.

so i made up my shopping list, haveta go to the store today. waiting for nick to wake up so we can have lunch and there is nothing here so i will have to get creative on a hangover. nice.

anyway the plan is to go shopping on mondays, eat a well balanced, well planned meal each night of the week. no freaking out cuz we don't know what we're having or last minute rushing to pull it together.

2007-02-19T09:35:00.000-06:00

went to the peninsula hotel last night for the final bridal event of the weekend. it was a great night, and i can barely put any thoughts together because i am still either a: drunk b: tired c: dumb. ok or d: all of the above. which is what i am. all of the above.
the drinks were flowin', the music was pumping, the food (sushi bar, mini deserts...yum) was fantastic, the fashion show: vera wang.....'nuff said.
we stayed too long, hello i am not surprised and then felt like we should probably drink AND smoke, so we went to the bar. some old english guy started talking to us and telling us about his private jet and his money (small dick, what?) so he bought us a $200 bottle of champagne, we let him talk to us while we downed it and then we left him there.
we saw "jenny yoo" now that is her unofficial name. it was tonya from the jenny yoo showroom, the one we LOVED and are buying our dresses from. she got sloppy and had to go home about 30 minutes before we did. we also saw brandi the bitch from ultimate bride. she saw us, recognized us and DIDN'T EVEN TRY TO SAY HELLO. ok, you dumb girl. even if you had a clue, you have so screwed yourself. i will make sure when i talk to anyone getting married in chicago that i mention how much you suck. oh yeah, and the barrette in your hair...not happening for ya.

go here for AWESOME bridesmaid dresses:

2007-02-18T12:42:00.000-06:00

http://www.jennyyoo.com/intro.html

2007-02-17T15:47:00.000-06:00

yesterday was a success! we found dresses at jenny yoo. they have a great showroom downtown. it's like being in a huge closet full of great gowns...the girl who helped us was really sweet. (more on who's not so sweet, BRANDI at ultimate bride, later.) it was a private appointment so the four of us had run of the entire place. the only way it could have been better was if we had a bottle of champagne! tracey (bride to be) did not dictate anything , (color/style)just for each of us to pick the best dress for our body and to look really good...so we each chose something different, but the same color and the same fabric. we had so much fun, then we went for some drinks and somehow decided it would be a good idea to burn BRANDI's business card....ok, so she was a total snot from the word go. we got to ultimate bride, told her what we were looking for (a designer named thread) and what we thought we liked. she shoved all 3 of us into the same room, tossed a couple of dresses at us and never really came back. i'm glad i'm over it now, otherwise i would have so much more nastiness to say.

2007-02-16T10:25:00.000-06:00

so last night we watched grey's anatomy, and i kindof hope meredith dies:) but then the show will suck, so i kindof don't...
anyway, just waxed my eyebrows myself. i wanted to go to luxe to get them done, but i won't have time today. i was starting to look like jim's dad from american pie, so i thought i better get on it. going out with my friends today to look at bridesmaid dresses, can't wait, i ate an entire 500 calorie "chipwich" last night with jason. not even sure if that's the real name of those things. it's two cookies with ice cream smashed in the middle, and when you finish it, you just wish you had another. gross.
gotta get nick ready for anna. he likes her better than me anyway, so it won't be hard. she's a great sitter and if she brings her kid, nick won't even know i exist. i'm sitting here all ready with my makeup on, and i think i look like a whore with all of this eyemakeup. i used to wear it all the time and then i kinda quit wearing it. i swore i wouldn't be one of those mom's that looks like shit in a t-shirt and jeans and no make up when my husband comes home from work...but i have turned in to one. it never seems worth the effort for my 1 year old, does he care? he only cares if we are gonna play upstairs or downstairs or outside. he's gonna wake up soon and i have a ton of shit todo before anna gets here...jason it's frozen pizza for you tonight:) i'll be out with the girls.

first post

2007-02-15T15:49:00.000-06:00

ok, so i am trying something totally new. after watching some primetime special about polygamy last night with jason and drinking a bottle of wine or two (mostly consumed by him) i have decided that having another wife around the house isn't such a bad idea. i actually think it would be great to have someone else around here when i want to make dinner, get my eyebrows waxed, or go to the grocery. someone who loves my kid as much as i do, plays with him all day long, is here whenever i need, someone to help plan meals, do household chores, and someone I DON'T HAVE TO PAY! i need another wife, and i bet it sounds good to you too;)